Bachelorette
by Poisoned Scarlet
Summary: In which the girls take Winry out for a swing and discover that thongs aren't just meant for women and Edward Elric looked positively sinful in a tux...
1. Chapter 1

**Bachelorette  
by. **_Poisoned Scarlet_

**Summary: **In which the girls take Winry out for a swing and discover that thongs aren't just for women and Edward Elric looked positively sinful in a tux...  
**Rating: M** for language, sexual situations/facilities, alcohol usage.**  
Genre: **Humor/Romance.**  
Pairing(s): **Ed/Winry; assorted others.**  
A/N: **I find this short story thoroughly amusing simply because I like the meaningless, one-sided, rivalry I added XD I also managed to cut this one in half or else it'd be just as long as Coming of Age!**  
Story Notes: **_Post-Promised Day! This can be read as a stand-alone but it sort of follows my previous fanfiction: Coming of Age._

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist.

* * *

"You _sure_ you'll be fine by yourself?"

"Ed, I'm just going to the spa with the girls!" Winry assured, with a roll of her eyes. "There's absolutely _nothing_ to be worried about! You'll be here with Al and Pitt so just enjoy a day without me!"

"But I like being with you..." he mumbled, annoyed with the thought of being left alone with the two men that lingered behind him. Or, to be specific, _man. _He could hear Alphonse quietly start conversation with Pitt, who responded politely enough.

He didn't know why but Pitt was simply a person who grated Ed's nerves like nothing else. Also, the fact that he openly flirted with Winry back when they used to live in Resembool when he was fifteen might have had something to do with his inextinguishable ire...

"Um..." Winry looked a little hesitant now. She glanced back to the car, to Riza, who waved her inside and then to Rebecca and Sciezska, both, of which, sat in the back and smiled encouragingly at her. She glimpsed Nelly giving Pitt a quick peck on the cheek before she squeezed into the back seat of the state vehicle Riza borrowed, glancing at her curiously.

"Just go," Edward sighed after a few more seconds of silence, knowing she wanted to go and knowing that he had no right to deny her some fun. "You'll be back before ten, though, right?"

"Yup! Thanks, Ed!" she beamed, feeling better now that Edward had given her the okay – however reluctant it sounded. She reached forward and pecked him on the lips, hurrying to the front of the car and slamming the door as she settled in.

"You better behave, Ed!" Winry shouted out the window.

"I should be telling _you_ that!" he complained, scowling. "You better keep your word and be back by ten or so help me—!"

"She'll be back by ten!" Rebecca snapped. "Jeez, you're worse than my dad and he's already _dead_!"

Ed glared.

"Don't worry your little head, Winry!" Pitt answered her silent concern, coming up beside Edward. The blonde wrinkled his nose at the proximity and stepped to the side, doing absolutely nothing to hide the dislike as Pitt smiled reassuringly at Winry. "We'll just be in the house and have us a few drinks! Nothing big! You all have fun!"

"Thanks, Pitt!" Winry thanked gratefully, still a little unsure but Riza floored it and they left down the street; leaving Edward, Al and Pitt on the sidewalk.

It was silent for a moment.

"So, you two want to go inside?" Pitt asked, friendlily.

"Tch," Ed scoffed, shoving his hands into his pockets and not sparing him a glance.

Alphonse answered instead, sounding ways more polite than the elder Elric. "Sure, Pitt. How've you been these past few years? It's been a while since we last saw you!"

"I've been great!" Pitt grinned. "Nelly's a doll and we've finally got our own place!"

Edward merely glanced back down the street, rather forlorn. It was eight in the morning and they would not be back until ten or later, knowing the girls that rode with Winry were rather liberal and wild. There was an uncomfortable twist in his gut; an instinct that told him he should have gone with Winry – even if all he would do was stand around and wait for them to come out of their insufferable girl talk as they pampered themselves.

"Come on in! I've got a pack of beer in the fridge!"

Ed refrained from sighing.

It was going to be a long day.

Meanwhile, Winry was sure that she had never seen Central City as bustling as it was that day. Riza was a safe driver, although she noticed they were going fairly fast, and Rebecca and Sciezska were friendly and loud – something that relaxed her tense shoulders the closer they neared the downtown spa resort they were going to enjoy to the fullest.

"How's Roy been treating you, Riza?" Rebecca asked, leaning between the front seats to glance at the sandy blonde.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Riza replied, tone losing some of the steel edge it usually held.

"Don't give me that!" Rebecca snorted. "That womanizer Roy hasn't seen a woman in _months_, not even for a cup of coffee! That can only mean one thing: you did something! So, spill – there's a reason why they placed me in the investigations department after Hugh's passed away!"

Riza resisted a sigh. "Nothing is going on between us, Rebecca. I'm being honest."

"Are you sure?" Sciezska asked, skeptical. "Because I catch the Brigadier glancing at you a lot when you're in the office..."

"C'mon, Riza!" Winry interjected, coaxingly. "It'll stay between us, right girls?"

The two in the back chorused in agreement. Nelly allowed a brief smile as the three girls continued to pester Riza, who's annoyance could be seen in the way she gripped the steering wheel and jerky turns as they came closer and closer to the resort.

"Nothing happened!" Riza snapped, at her limit. "The Brigadier simply asked me for a casual dinner a few months ago and...I suppose it's become traditional to eat out every Saturday night since."

Rebecca squealed. "That's my girl! You wrap Roy around your little finger!"

Winry grinned. "That's great, Riza! You and Mustang always made such a cute couple!"

"Speaking of cute couples," Nelly spoke up, adjusting herself in the leather seat and leaning over a bit to properly speak to Winry. "Let me see that ring of yours!"

Winry rose her hand, allowing the girls to coo over the shimmering engagement band that slipped perfectly into her ring finger. There was nothing majorly ostentatious about the ring, which was what amused her the most as Edward was something of an attention-grabber, but the simplicity of the ring itself was enough to make it eye-catching. The gem was a deep blue sapphire; a small crown of diamonds trickling around the sleek gold band.

"How long did it take him to finally find the balls to do it?" Rebecca asked, mischievously.

"Not that long!" Winry defended, with a wry grin. "Just...three years?"

Sciezska giggled. "Well, twenty one is a perfect age to be engaged! Wait a second, Nelly was it?" The bookworm turned to the new acquaintance, who started at being referred to so quickly. "You and Pitt seemed to be quite close. Winry tells me that you have been with him for a while now...?"

"Ever since we turned fifteen," Nelly answered fondly. "He asked for my hand when he became eighteen."

"Wow," Rebecca whistled. Then she sighed, longingly. "I need to find myself a good man! You girls have all the luck! I want a knock out, too!"

"Havoc seems to have some interest," Riza mused aloud, steering the car into the parking lot of the grand spa resort. The building was stylish, expensive, Winry noticed apprehensively, and had high ratings from the rumors and talk she heard whenever she strolled around the busier streets of Central on her way to the automail shop she owned.

"Havoc is _always _interested," Rebecca huffed. "He gets around more than a subway during rush hour!"

"He does not," Sciezska defended, frowning at the comparison. "Havoc is a great guy! He's also looking for a good woman! You two should give it a try. It wouldn't hurt, would it?"

"Maybe," the curly haired woman replied vaguely, opening the door to exit the vehicle. Winry stretched once outside, smiling at Nelly as the girl smoothed her modestly cut shirt. Riza quickly locked the doors, pointing to the building with a small smile.

"You ready to leave your troubles behind for a few hours?" she humored, leading the way into the resort.

"Are you _sure_ you guys want to go in?" Winry asked, nervous. "I mean, it looks so expensive...you all don't have to do this for me! A nice lunch in a restaurant would do!"

"Don't sweat it, honey!" Rebecca dismissed her concerns. "Riza's man got us a few discounts! Trust me, it's cheaper than you'd believe!" They entered the modern facility, Winry's eyes tracing the faux gold that lined the interior gracefully. The receptionist was professional, friendlily detached, she would say, and led them down an equally grandiose hall to a large room that held five neatly sheeted massage tables with a few stands by it that held lotions and towels and such.

"Your nine o clock appointment will be here shortly," the man informed, gesturing for their bags and coats. "We shall hold your belongings in the coat room. Please disrobe in the back; there should be a set of clean towels set out for you. You five enjoy yourselves," he smiled, the smile looking genuine as he exited and left them inside the room.

"So..." Winry began, unsurely.

"Don't worry," Rebecca rolled her eyes. "The masseuses are female since Ed would _kill _us if he found out another guy got to feel you up legally," she winked. "But you're missing _out_!" She skipped to the back, already stripping as the girls followed, amused by the curly haired woman's enthusiasm.

A few minutes later, they were prepared for the relaxation of their lives. The doors behind them opened quietly, five woman walking inside with friendly smiles on their faces and wearing the resorts casual uniform.

The rest of the two hours were spent letting their troubles go. Winry hadn't known she needed a massage until the woman's magical fingers pressed into the many knots in her back, commenting that she was very stressed and she should watch herself more often.

"Ooh, that's the spot!" Nelly moaned, the masseuse beaming at the satisfied purr.

"What's after this?" Winry lazily asked.

"Facial," Riza grunted, sighing when the woman managed to get rid of another knot in her neck. "We're getting our nails done, too."

"And a mud bath! We _are_ getting a mud bath, right? Please!" Rebecca whined.

"Sure," Sciezska yawned, a content smile curving her lips. "Whatever you say..."

The rest of the day was spent within the soothing compound of the spa resort. Winry was sure she had never had so many women fawning over her, exfoliating her face and painting her nails a pretty rouge color that they gushed would make her stand out. The rest seemed just as pampered as her, Rebecca going as far as saying she'd also get engaged if it meant being allowed to treat herself so well.

Winry hadn't even noticed just how fast time had passed because, before she knew it, they were coming out of the sauna with towels wrapped around them, laughing, as it was already five in the evening and time for them to ditch the safe walls of the spa center and go out into the lime light of nightlife in Central.

"Ah! I feel so rejuvenated! You don't find resorts like these back in Resembool!" Nelly stretched, feeling more comfortable around the girls after their bonding within the spa.

"You're telling me," Winry smiled. "I sort of want to go home now..."

"Oh, no you don't!" Rebecca grinned, eyes twinkling with mischief. "We're not done with your bachelorette party yet, Winry! We've still got a _lot_ of things to do before you're allowed to reunite with your precious Eddy!"

"Come on," Riza called, unlocking the doors and allowing them inside the car. "We're going to drop by my place to change."

Winry blinked owlishly. "Ch-change? What do you mean change?"

"As in, removing this assemble of clothing for another," Sciezska cheekily replied, earning a light glare from Winry.

"I _know _what it means! I just don't know _why _we have to! I'm fine in these clothes."

"Jeans and a tank top?" Nelly quirked a brow, looking disapproving. "Sorry, sweetheart, but that won't do for where we're going!"

"Where _are _we going?" Winry asked, frustratingly. "I have a feeling you guys planned this out without telling me!"

"We did," Riza smirked. "Don't worry – it's nothing bad. It's just a little stroll out in the more wild parts of Central."

"Wild...?" she repeated, with a gulp.

"Don't worry, we'll _protect_ you," Rebecca stifled a laugh, giggling when Winry scowled and swatted her away. Riza made several turns, going down a quiet neighborhood before parking across from a rather looming Victorian-build apartment complex.

"Come inside! I've got your dress in here, Winry!" Riza smiled, opening her door and allowing the girls inside. The military woman had gotten around to finally distributing the objects that had been neatly kept within cardboard boxes and the simplistic yet elegant style glowed through the entire house in the shape of pristine rugs and wood-crafted furniture.

"I brought my own dress!" Nelly alerted, holding up her bag brightly.

"The bathrooms down the hall!" Riza instructed, smiling as the girl skipped over to the bathroom along with Rebecca, who also had her assemble of party-clothes within her bag. Sciezska retrieved the dress and shoes she had left at Riza's house days prior quickly, following the two girls and leaving Winry with Riza in the bedroom.

"You didn't have to get me a dress..." Winry began, guiltily.

"Don't worry, it was no trouble at all," Riza assured casually, taking out a beautiful black, cocktail, dress from the closet. Winry's eyes widened at the plummeting cleavage line and rather skimpy length. The heels, thankfully, were small but the amount of leg she would be showing would no doubt enrage a certain overprotective fiancee of hers who had a knack of being selfish when it came to her womanly attributes.

"What Edward doesn't know won't hurt him," Riza commented, upon seeing the hesitant glimmer in her usually bright blue eyes. "He thinks you're still at the spa."

"We lied to him?" Winry gaped, suddenly struck with the thought that they really did _lie to him_. "No, oh no! He'll find out! Trust me on this, Riza, he _will _find out!"

"We're hoping he'll find out _after _you've had your fun," Riza chuckled, amused by the girls miffed face as she pushed the dress into her arms and took out her own. Her own was a deep silk purple that hugged her body tightly; showing junctions and curves that Winry would say were indecent once Riza disrobed and changed quickly.

"We better hurry before Rebecca starts whining," Riza smiled encouragingly. Winry was already pulling the dress over her head, tugging it down and glancing at the full-length mirror the sharp-marks man kept at the far corner wall. The black dress also hugged her shape, creating the lustrous illusion of mischief instead of the elegant flow Riza's dress expressed.

"You girls ready for the time of your young lives?"

"Wow, Rebecca, what are you _wearing?_" Winry gasped, staring at the shameless display of legs and breasts. The woman's dress was more seductress-ready and was less than decent with the plunging neckline and high splits on the side of the black, silk, dress. She could see stockings, heels that looked painful to walk in matched along with ruby lipstick and a mysterious shadowing around her eyes; enhancing her cat-like gaze to become penetrating, almost.

Sciezska readied in second place with her own royal blue short dress with her hair pulled up with a clip ; a stark comparison to Nelly's rather modest dress, reaching an inch or two below mid-thigh with ruffles that gave her a more cute-girly appearance than the utterly lust-worthy dresses the other women wore.

Winry even found herself wanting to switch with Nelly but she knew the girl would never allow it – far too modest to wear such a dress – and she knew Riza and Rebecca wouldn't let her, regardless. So Winry let Riza apply some shimmering lip gloss and dab her eyelids a smokey gray as Sciezska and Rebecca helped by pinning her hair back and allowing a few soft tresses to cascade down her shoulders neatly.

"Ed is going to be pissed," Winry warned, not too concerned anymore. She supposed they were going out clubbing, how bad could that be?

"He's always pissed," Rebecca snorted.

"Ed's the little man angry at the world..." Nelly murmured, causing Winry to snort in laughter.

"He's not so little anymore," Winry sang out. "In both ways."

Riza smirked. "Calm down there, Winry, we really don't want to know about your nightlife."

"Says you!" Rebecca scoffed. She grinned leeringly at Winry. "On a scale of one to ten, ten being the worst and one being the best, what would your rate him?"

"Rebecca!" Sciezska scolded, although the amused smile on her face dampened the reprimand. "That's completely private stuff! You can't go asking about that!"

"She's right you know," Winry agreed, giggling. "Sorry, Rebecca, but I can't say!"

"Oh, come on!" the woman complained. "It's just a number!"

"A number that defines his workability..." Riza muttered, cracking a smile when the girls roared in laughter.

"Alright! All done!" Nelly announced, glancing at the window quickly. "It's getting dark! Perfect!"

"Let's go then!" Winry beamed, allowing Sciezska to lead her out as Riza grabbed her thigh holster and quickly snapped it on; the shiny glint of her gun reflecting against the ceiling fixture calming Winry down. So long as Riza had her gun and Rebecca her fighting skills, she was sure she would be safe even though she would admit she would feel safer if she had her wrench on her person somewhere...

"Okay, Winry," Rebecca began, cautiously. "The place we're taking you stays strictly between all of us, alright? As long as you don't blab to Edward, we're safe! Can we count on you?"

"What're you guys so worried about?" Winry laughed. "We're just going to some club, right?"

"You could call it that," Sciezska mumbled, cheeks coloring pink.

Her eyes narrowed. "Right? You guys..."

"Look, just trust me when we say that all the women who get married off do this!" Nelly hastily said. "Even I did it although Pitt found out a few months later and let me have it...but nothing happened and that's what we intend to do to you!" she insisted.

"Okay, so where are we going?" Winry got in the car, the girls following quickly. "Riza?"

"When we get there, you'll see," she smiled, a cunning smile that made Winry's stomach knot uncomfortably.

"You guys _do_ know that if it's something bad, Ed'll have your heads on spears, right?" she nervously commented, causing Sciezska and Nelly to glance at each other before snickering.

"That's why you won't _tell_ him," Rebecca purred, a smirk on her lips. "What he doesn't know won't kill him!"

"Until he finds out..." Winry mumbled.

"Which he won't unless you screw up and let it slip," Nelly chimed.

"You guys, Edward didn't become a State Alchemist when he was _twelve _because he was special, no matter how much he says he is," Winry sighed, rubbing her temples as Riza made an abrupt turn, driving them into the more youth-friendly part of Central City. "He became a State Alchemist because he's a genius and he doesn't need that many hints to figure out what I'm hiding. Trust me, once I accidentally mentioned that the power bill would be high and he figured out that I wasted more than half my salary on tools and clothes, which was why I was concerned over the bill."

"But anyone could've figured that out!" Rebecca complained. "He's practically attached to the hip with you! What, is this the first time since you two got together that you've been separated?"

"No, don't be ridiculous!" Winry scoffed. "He left for about two months with Alphonse to some retreat to train the mind or something with their ex-teacher last year. I said that a month _after_ he came back and I bought the tools."

"Whoa," Nelly commented, brows risen to show her impress.

"Yeah, that's what I said, too..."

"We're here," Riza alerted, parking the car behind the others that lined the front street of a rather empty sidewalk. While the rest of the area was bustling with young life, Winry noticed that this area was almost bare of anyone save for the occasional group of friends that laughed as they walked past.

"But—!"

"Don't worry, if he's as smart as you say he is then you better party until your heels crack because you aren't going to bail on us yet!" Rebecca grinned, rakishly. "Not until you've had a couple of vodka shots and I get totally smashed!"

"C'mon!" Nelly excitedly squealed, tugging Winry out by the arm. The girls dragged her to the empty entrance, making Winry suspicious it was even inhabited – given the clean but ominous front of the facility. The sign was simple, the glowing words _The Gentleman's Alliance _illuminated simply. However, she could faintly hear the bass from inside; laughter and chatter if she focused hard enough. Not even the thick brick walls could muffle the inside noises completely...

"Are you _sure_ it's here?" Winry asked, curiously. She tried to tug her dress lower when she noticed a few men stare from across the street. "It looks really empty..."

"Trust me," Riza smiled, patting her back reassuringly. "It looks empty and boring but it is far from it!" The woman knocked on the black door twice, causing it to open and reveal a looming, muscular, man with menacing eyes and a deep-set scowl.

"Your name?" the bouncer asked, with a grunt as he took out the clipboard he kept within the deep pockets of his inner coat.

"Hawkeye," she replied simply.

"They with you?"

"Yes."

"Go inside," the brutish man grinned, softening his expression into a more friendly face. "Enjoy yourselves, girls."

"Oh, we will," Rebecca winked, dragging Nelly and Winry in by the arm. The interior, Winry discovered with awe, was definitely _not _like the outside. It was booming with life and music, waitresses in skimpy attires catering the swaying crowd within. Tables and booths lined the sides, bustling with young adults, mostly women with an occasional man here and there, and colorful lights hung from the ceiling as the center stage revealed...men.

Winry's eyes became rounded, wide, and her mouth slacked when she noticed what the men were doing with shameless abandon. They were dressed in tight tuxedo's, the musky scent of fresh wash wafting to her with every movement; the flashing lights creating the alluring illusion of irrisistable want as they began to slowly remove their clothing...

_Uh oh._

"G-guys...?" Winry squeaked, stomach plummeting at what this meant when they walked her to an empty booth near the front stage – giving them a perfect view of the undressing men with handsome faces and smirking lips.

"Remember," Rebecca sang, the grin on her face stretching so wide Winry was sure if it stretched any more it would split her face in two, "you can't tell Edward that we took you to a male strip-joint!"

She was never going to hear the end of it as the men removed their shirts to reveal wonderfully sculpted abs and Winry downed a shot of vodka to calm her fried nerves.

* * *

Edward Elric was annoyed.

Pitt was trying to be the hospitable host and Ed had nothing against that except that it was so _boring. _The beer he had taken from the fridge was probably the only thing that really entertained him, as Pitt and his brother immersed themselves in some mind-numbing talk he wasn't interested in. It wasn't like Pitt was interested in Alchemy and he knew fairly well that the once-childhood friend was more into the corrupt ways of politics and secretive military – being a soldier himself with a good salary and respectable rank.

His eyes flashed to the clock for the five thousandth time that day, revealing digits he knew by memory now: six thirty. He still need a few more hours to go before he could promptly say that Winry was late and he needed to go pick her up before some freak tried something on her.

"Relax, Ed," Pitt laughed, noticing his rigid shoulders and impatiently tapping foot. "She's fine! She's with Nelly – she wouldn't let anything happen to her!"

"I bet," Ed muttered, acerbically.

"Brother," Al sighed. "What has you so uptight? Maybe talking about it will help you calm down a bit."

"Nothing has me uptight, Al!" he snapped, making the younger sibling raise a skeptical brow. "Look, how about you go back to gushing about how _cute _Mei is and how _adorable _Nelly is and I just sit here and take it all!" he sneered, scowl pulling his lips down.

"Is that what has you so grouchy?" Pitt asked, amused. "We can gush about Winry, too, if it makes you feel any better."

"No. It won't," he flatly stated. "What the hell did they say they were doing again?"

"Riza said they were going to take her to a spa resort for the entire day," Al explained, with a thoughtful expression.

"Yeah, and then they were going to go to some ballroom or something," Pitt added, grabbing another beer and popping it open.

At this, Ed perked up. "...Ballroom?"

"Yeah, didn't she tell you?" Pitt asked, brows creased. Suddenly, the atmosphere had become suffocating and the man cleared his throat nervously at the piercing stare he received from Edward. "Well, Nelly told me they were going to surprise Winry and take her to some ballroom out by downtown. I think it was by Maplewood and Venue."

"Al, what's by Maplewood and Venue?" Ed asked automatically, his brother already working on it; recalling the streets and sights silently.

"Well, I think they're in the red light district..."

"Red light district?" both Pitt and Ed asked in unison; Edward glaring at Pitt before focusing on his brother again.

"It's dubbed the red light district," Al continued, "because it's where all the main nightly attractions are. It's actually just downtown Central – but at night it's always full of people. There's mostly clubs and restaurants around that part." Upon seeing his brothers conflicted expression, Al quickly added: "Don't worry, brother, I doubt Winry is in any danger! I bet she's having the time of her life in some restaurant!"

"Actually..." Pitt murmured, dropping his gaze. "Hey, do ya'll remember the reason why they're goin' out _anyway_?"

"Winry said they were going to take her out for some fun, to the spa like Al said," Ed frowned. "They never...really told me _why_... I just assumed it was a girl thing or something."

Pitt chewed on his bottom lip, deliberating his words. Then he remembered seeing the glittering wedding ring on the pretty blonde's finger and it all fit into place. His eyes widened, face flashing with shock that made both brothers nervous. Pitt's eyes flashed to Ed's hand, bare of any ring as he would get his on the alter.

"Uh oh..."

"What?" Ed asked, panicked. "What's the matter? Why'd you say 'uh oh'? PITT!"

"Edward, you wouldn't be engaged to Winry, would you?" Pitt began, with trepidation.

"Yes," he replied, with no hesitation. "I asked her to marry me around two months ago, why?"

"Aw, shit!" Pitt cursed. "She's doing it again!"

"Doing _what_ again?" Al asked, hesitantly.

"Well, when I asked Nelly to marry me, she went out with her friends just like Winry did today," he began, visibly disgruntled. "Only I found out she _didn't_ really spend all the time at the amusement park and instead went to some shitty strip joint out by downtown Central!"

"Brother—wait!" Al grabbed Ed by the cuff, forcing to him to sit down as the instant 'strip-joint' slipped from Pitt's lips, he had stood up rigidly and made the beeline for the door. "Wait up! How do we even know they're even there? Winry wouldn't _do_ that!"

"Of course she wouldn't!" Ed snapped, sneeringly. "But _they're_ surprising her! She doesn't know any better! Lets go, before she gets into more trouble than she's worth!" He shrugged off his brothers hand, throwing the door open and stalking down the hall with a rage that made his mouth contort into a nasty scowl and eyes light up dangerously.

"Wait! Edward!" Pitt ran after him, placing a hand on his shoulder to stop him.

"Don't touch me!" he snapped.

"Look," Pitt began, with a sigh."Even if we do manage to get there, we won't be able to go inside."

"And _why_ _not_?" Ed asked, nastily.

"Because they've got a bouncer and let me tell you: beating him up will get you thrown into Central Jail for two days!"

"So? I'll get Roy to bail me," he shrugged, not at all concerned at being incarcerated so long as he got his fiancee out of that devilish place.

"Ed, Pitt's right," Al came up behind the country boy, a worried frown on his face. "Winry will be upset if she finds out you got thrown in jail because you let your emotions get to you again! We're not even sure if she's in there, anyway!"

"That's why we're going to go _check_, Al," Ed rolled his eyes. "Now, c'mon, that's your girl in there, too, you know!" He tossed meaningfully at Pitt, who pressed his lips together. "We'll just go check it out to see if they're actually inside, alright? If they're not, we'll leave and pretend it _never_ happened," he bargained flatly.

"But..." Al trailed off, hesitantly.

"If it was Mei in there, would you go?" Ed convinced, using his trump card.

Al sighed resignedly. "Okay. But we're only going to _check_, got it?"

"Deal!" Ed nodded, smug he had gotten his way. "Now, lets go, before those idiots corrupt my Winry anymore than they already have!"

"Hey! Nelly's not an idiot!"

Ed rolled his eyes in response.


	2. Chapter 2

**Bachelorette  
by. **_Poisoned Scarlet_

She would admit that she was having the time of her life. The drinks just kept coming and the half-naked guys dancing on the stage were ignorable, thank goodness, the more they got immersed in their own conversation. The girl talk was something she had needed for a while now, questions and answers on several topics helpful in making her life much easier.

"I don't know," Rebecca sighed, swishing the glass in her hand idly. "Havoc doesn't seem like the committed type. He's too wild!"

"So are you," Riza countered, finishing her martini and waving her hand to order another one. A man addressed her this time, his handsome face bearing a smirk as he delivered another drink to the woman, who a rose an amused brow at the man's shameless glance over all of them, pausing on Sciezska momentarily before he left to tend the other guests.

"Oooh!" Nelly and Rebecca chorused, laughing at the bright red on the bookworms face. Winry also giggled, taking another small sip of her Kamikaze, something she had grown fond of as it was her fourth glass in the time span of two hours and it didn't necessarily taste heavily of vodka. She wanted to keep her head on right; not fully trusting the girls who brought her to a _strip club _for crying out loud!

"So, Win, its already seven..." Nelly trailed off, mischievously.

"Oh! Yay!" Rebecca cheered, finishing her own drink in one swing. Her eyes browsed the selection of men that had begun to crowd the club with intense scrutiny, her eyes locking on a fair black head with nice triceps. "I call him!" she shouted, attracting the mans attention. She beckoned him with a finger, a smirk stretching on her lips as the man swaggered to her with an equally roguish smirk.

"Ma'am?" he asked, voice smooth.

"Hel-_lo_ hot stuff!" The woman crackled, sliding out of her seat and taking the man by the hand, leading him to the dance floor that was swarming with other women and escorts.

"What was that all about?" Winry blinked, confused.

"Strip joint, duh, it comes with the guys," Nell grinned knowingly. She sat back in her seat. "I, however, am a married woman so I can't partake in such exciting adventures..." she sighed. "Sometimes I wish I was single again but I wouldn't trade Pitt for anything!"

"I-I'm about to get married, too, you know!" Winry feebly countered, only earning a laugh from both Riza and Sciezska.

"Ah ah," Sciezska wagged a finger at her, pushing her lenses up on the bridge of her nose "This is your bachelorette party, remember? We're celebrating your single womanhood by giving you all the experience you need to keep Edward nice and docile!"

"I don't need any experience," she mumbled, cheeks coloring red at the implications.

"You say that now," Riza smiled, humored.

"What about you?" Winry shot at the usually stern military woman; the woman whom she would have never assumed was the type to venture into places such as these. "Aren't you hitting something off with Mr Mustang? Wouldn't he be shocked to see you in these places?"

"Probably," Riza shrugged. "But it's nothing he hasn't done before himself. He used to be a regular in the strip club across from this one – for males."

"He-he was?" Winry asked, surprised.

"Mmhmm," Riza slammed the glass on the table a little too loudly. "So I can justify my actions as completely normal. We're not dating – the Fraternization Act prevents it so I find nothing wrong in allowing myself a few relaxing hours with my friends," she pursed her lips.

Winry had the feeling Riza was simply extracting revenge, by the way the woman's ruby chocolate eyes flashed with annoyance and her neatly done nails tapped against the table briskly at being reminded why she had disliked Roy Mustang in the first place – at least, before he managed to make her fall with those coy black eyes of his and that cunning smirk...

"_Ladies_, are you enjoying yourselves tonight? It's my duty to keep you all nice and satisfied," a seductive voice came from beside them. Winry rose her eyes to meet with glittering green ones. She gulped, as he man eyed her once before offering his hand to her. "Would you mind a dance? You look a little..._tense_."

The way he said the word had all the wrong meanings and she felt her gut give a stab.

"I-I really shouldn't—!"

"She'll do it!" Nelly and Sciezska interrupted her, giving her an encouraging push to the shirtless man with a lean stomach. "Be sure to give her a wild ride," Nelly chirped slyly, waving as Winry was carefully pulled to the dance floor, where he grabbed her waist and grinded against her; causing the girl to freeze up as the man had his way with her.

_This is wrong, _she thought, guilt weighing her down. She eventually responded, letting the pulsing lights and ear-pounding music drown out the escorts soft breathing near her neck. The guilt weighed her down some more and she took a glass from a waitresses' giving platter and downed it; trying to rid herself of the emotion that told her dancing with another man so intimately would not end well and would cause her more harm than good.

But the drink settled with the rest, causing her to act a little more careless than usual as the escort twirled her on the floor; a laugh bubbling up her throat as she snatched another drink and downed it as well.

It didn't take her long to begin feeling the music under her skin; her head spinning and body loose as she downed another small shot she had gotten from another woman walking about the club with a tray of refreshments.

She was more off dancing by herself than with the male stripper, she realized after a whole twenty minutes of steadily drifting away from him. But he always brought her back close to him when she strayed too far alone.

"Having fun?" Rebecca's amused voice rang from behind her a few songs later.

"You have got no idea!" Winry laughed. She could feel sweat drench her neck, trickle down her forehead as the intense heat that concentrated from all the bodies moving about began to get to her. The heat was welcomed, however, as she took another drink from the glass cup held in her hand.

"I told you so!" she chimed happily.

"I've never felt so free!" Winry slurred, the vodka shots doing their damage as the male escorts hand brushed under the tantalizing swell of her breast while his other hand rested on her hip loosely.

Winry barely noticed.

"Whoa, you're sounding a little too happy there," Rebecca frowned and she winked at the man she had been having a sensual dance with. She let him go, floating over to Winry, who's dress had provocatively scrunched up to show more skin than intended.

Rebecca pulled the dress down, frowning when she noticed Winry swat her hand away and finish the last bit of alcohol in the glass she held in her hand, head tossed back so she could briefly look at the flashing lights...

"Don't let her drink anymore!" Rebecca instructed to the man holding her, who nodded absently. "She's gettin' married! I don't need her fiancee bitching at me for letting her have a little _too_ much fun! I want her to come out of here a virgin by body!"

"Got it!" the man smirked.

Rebecca scowled in response but was whisked away by another escort, this one a sunny blonde with strange hazel eyes that made the curly haired woman swoon shamelessly.

"Want another drink?" the escort asked Winry, who nodded woozily, hips swaying to the quick beat of the music that sounded from all around her. She felt the man leave her and she wandered deeper into the crowd; the heat making her bothered and her heart pound in her throat. She closed her eyes, swaying along with the other bodies without any concern at all.

She felt better, dancing alone.

There wasn't the need to bury the guilt and shame from being with another man, however detached it might be, and she could let the sounds and sensations overwhelm her for a few minutes as the beat reached its peak...

* * *

Edward dusted his hands, peering down the empty hall for a second before motioning the others to follow him. They had broken into the strip joint by using the back wall and Al's handy alchemy abilities. Although the man had been reluctant to use his alchemical skill for breaking into a club, Edward had once again used his trump card and brought Mei into the picture; asking him if he would like it if Mei was inside being harassed by a bunch of dirty guys who were only after _one_ thing and _one _thing only.

"Well, I _guess_..."

"That's right – so open a hole in the goddamn wall already!"

"Shh, Ed, they'll hear you!"

"Don't tell me what to do, Pitt!"

They had knocked out three male strippers on their way inside, stealing their tuxes and hiding their unconscious bodies in the dressing rooms; adjusting them in a way that would alleviate suspicion should someone enter the room.

"What do we do now?" Pitt asked, straightening his bow tie in the reflection of a picture frame.

"See that?" Ed whispered, pointing to the stage. The sound seemed to come from that way, too. "That's gotta' be the way into the club. All we have to do is find them and get out. You find Nelly, I'll find Winry. Al, you can search for Hawkeye or Sciezska and give Rebecca a punch in the face for me if you see—!"

"Ed!" Al sharply barked.

"Let's go!" He motioned them forward, his steps loud and purposeful as his gold eyes glowed with annoyance. He ignored the weird looks he received from the strippers entering the hall, who did not recognize them at all, and simply slipped into the scene; squinting his eyes against the flashing lights and ear-splitting music.

"Wow, it's so full! It looked so empty from the outside!" Al yelled, astonished by how many women dominated the scene.

"Yeah, just goes to show you not to judge a book by its cover," Ed shouted back, also surprised as he was sure the building was empty or at least unpopular.

"Hurry up! Seems like happy hour is right around the corner!" Pitt reminded, eying the way the bachelors delivered drinks to tables and escorted women to the swaying crowd in the middle, before the stage that held several men provocatively undressing themselves down to their trousers now.

Al stared. "Is that...what I think it is?"

"Aw, fuck," Ed groaned, looking away.

"Yeah," Pitt sighed, rubbing his temples. "They're wearing thongs, Alphonse."

"I thought those were only for girls..." came Al's small voice.

"Apparently not," Ed grunted. "Stop looking at them, you idiot!" He smacked the back of his head, driving him out of his horror-induced stupor. "Split up!" Ed instructed sternly. He stood by the steps as Al and Pitt jogged down; getting lost in the motion of bodies. His sharp eyes scanned the crowd, looking for the head of sunny-yellow blonde that would make his twisting gut calm.

"Hey, sexy, how about taking me out for a ride?" a purr cam from beside him.

Ed jumped, snapping his eyes to the lustful brunette that had strolled up to him; the intention in her eyes very clear and Edward wondered if Winry was also doing—!

"Sorry, I don't work here," he flatly rejected her, running down the stairs with his nostrils flaring at the thought of Winry also fluttering her lashes at some no-good jerk. He spent at least ten minutes trying to spot Winry to no avail. He had checked most of the booths and he had caught glimpses of Nelly and Riza by the front, having a couple of drinks but no Winry, which ratcheted the need to find her and _fast_.

"Ed!" a far away voice called. "Ed!"

Edward snapped his head to Al, who was pointing fervently to the middle of the dance floor. He knew what he meant immediately and he shoved his way into the crowd of bodies, his eyes desperately searching for his lost fiancee as girls continued to openly eye him and shout out lustful statements. He found her, surprisingly, alone, moving in a way he had never seen her before and rousing something inside of him despite the urgency that simmered within.

He felt that simmer dwindle when he saw she was safe and sound – drunk, obviously, but otherwise safe.

That is, until a male stripper tapped her shoulder, his arm wrapping around her waist as Winry woozily grabbed the drink and tipped it into her pouty lips; sounds clashing and vision spinning as the alcohol tore its way through her body.

He saw red instantly.

"Get your _hands _off my woman!" Edward snarled, grabbing the stripper and knocking him out with one strong swing. He would thank the rotating lights and pounding music later, as the man fell on the floor with a groan; his hands latching onto his bleeding nose as stars swam before his eyes. "Winry—!"

"I told you to go away!" Winry moaned, her movements only growing more sensual. "Go find some other girl! I'm fine by myself..."

Edward grabbed her wrist and she yanked her hand away with a surprising amount of aggression. "Don't touch me—!" Her eyes widened when they caught in his even stare. Her shock knew no limits, as she dropped her gaze to his attire: the tight tux that all the men were wearing in the club. But she found that she liked it more on Edward, as a hot coil wound inside her stomach at the sight of his glowing burnished gold eyes. "E-Edward?"

"Having fun?" he sneered, his grip on her wrist almost bruising. "Because this is the _last _time you're ever going out with them again! I hope you liked your fucking joy ride!"

"Wh-what're you even doing here?" she asked, wondrous. "How did you find me?"

"That doesn't matter right now," Ed spat. "We're going home! Now!"

"What—no!" Winry tried to tug her hand out of his grip. "Not yet! It's barely eight! We just got here!"

"Too bad," he replied, sickly sweet. "You should've thought about the _before_! Now lets go, Winry, before I make you! I don't fucking care if I cause a scene, you should know that perfectly well!"

Winry pressed her lips together. He pulled her forward roughly and her foot twisted, causing her to wobbled forward. Ed caught her quickly before she fell on the floor, beside the groaning man who's nose was still quite bloody.

"How many drinks have you had?" he asked, incredulous.

"A lot," she mumbled. She dragged her hands up his arms, the black sleeves that hid the muscular limbs, and gripped the back; her body rubbing up against his as she leaned up to his face; her eyes droopy and clouded. "You should wear this more often," she whispered, Edward smelling her alcohol-drenched breath. Her nails raked down his back, causing a shiver to go down his spine despite himself. "You look better in a tux than you do shirtless..."

"Really?" Ed rose a skeptical brow.

"Mmhmm," she hummed, pushing against him and causing him to freeze up. The loud beats of the song could not drown out his suddenly pounding heart, as he felt Winry's hips dig into his groin shamelessly; the effect of the drinks she had consumed previously doing their job well in making her lose her head enough to act out so brashly. "Makes you look..._sexy_."

_Funny, everyone's been saying that to me lately, _Ed mused to himself, recalling the several times during his search for Winry he had been hollered at. "Right back at you," he smirked, taking notice of the silk dress that allowed his eyes to trace every tempting curve of her body with no trouble. "I've never seen _this_ dress before..." His smirk became a frown. It didn't settle well with him that she walked out in public so scantly clothed.

"Like it? Riza bought me for me," she replied huskily, snaking her arms around his neck. "I wasn't going to wear it at first but then I thought, what the hell?"

"You should've listened to your conscious," Ed murmured, his lips brushing against the soft skin of her neck. "Consider this dress burned and trashed."

"Ed!" she whined. "It's just a dress!"

"That shows too much," he added flatly. "You're not wearing this again. In fact, you're _never_ doing this again!" His arms tightened around her possessively, accentuating his point. She was already showing too much – she _had _already showed too much and it frankly pissed him off something nasty.

She shrugged. "I didn't wanna' come in the first place! But it was a really nice night...til you came."

"Well, excuse me!" he angerly shouted.

"I was kidding!" she laughed, crushing her lips against his before he could even finish his indignant shout. The hot coil in her stomach became unmistakeable as it yearned for his touch, her fingers digging into his back as her mouth forced his open; eyes half-closed and mind far away in a distant land as she allowed his hands to grope her ass.

He moved away quickly, regaining his head. "Winry, how about we finish this later?" he suggested, the rather tight pants doing him no justice at hiding the growing bulge. "Like at home...not in the middle of some dirty strip club."

"Sure, but first we do it here!" she grinned wickedly, catching his lips again and trying to unzip his pants; his panicked screams muffled by her mouth.

"Edward! What the hell are you doing?" Pitt hissed, gaping as he saw his childhood friends try to get it on in the middle of the godforsaken dance floor! In a _strip club! _They could not have worse timing, he found himself thinking.

Ed finally managed to remove himself from Winry, flipping her around quickly and holding her to him as he grabbed her hands; grunting when she merely grinded her ass into his crotch. "You tell _her_ that!" he shouted snappishly. "She's the one who's trying to rape me in public!"

"It's not rape if you're willing," Winry sang out drunkenly, cheeks flushed pink.

"Shuddup and be still!" he growled, his hand gripping her waist to prevent the torturous grinding. "Where's Al?" he demanded at Pitt.

"He's with Nelly and the rest!" Pitt explained over the loud music. "We were only waiting for you!"

"Good," he bit, pushing Winry forward as the girl lucidly gazed at the now-conscious male stripper sitting down beside her; holding a bloody nose and glaring at Edward through a tuft of black hair.

"What the hell was that for, you freak!" the male shouted indignantly, wobbly standing; hand drenched in blood.

Edward turned to him, eyes dark. "For touching my girl," he sneered, menacingly. "Now go back and fuck some desperate housewife! She's not interested." He turned away from his wide eyes, disappearing within another wave of bodies as he followed Pitt back to the booth; his anger knowing no bounds once he caught sight of the women who started such a risky excursion in the first place.

"You're such a party pooper, Ed!" Rebecca whined, scowling as she watched the man stalk forward with Winry protectively in his arms.

"Shut the _hell _up," he snarled. "You're lucky you're a fucking girl or else you'd be writhing on the floor like that asshole back there!" he jerked a thumb behind him, Rebecca's eyes flashing to the stripper she glimpsed sporting a bloody nose; calling out for help that was coming far too slow for his tastes.

"Edward, calm down—!"

"_Don't_!" he hissed, turning searing eyes to Sciezska, who flinched at being at the receiving end of such a burning look. "Tell me to calm down when you just _nearly_ let Winry get shit-faced out there in the middle of the goddamn floor by herself!" The implications were quite clear, if his furious eyes and gnashing teeth said anything.

Riza's eyes widened. "What? That's impossible! She was doing fine—!"

"Yeah, but look at her now," he scathingly replied, Riza's eyes falling to the absent look in the girls eyes as she enjoyed the heavenly buzz of alcohol. "We're leaving. You guys can stay here for all I fucking care," he scorned, turning away from them and stalking out of the club; Al in tow along with Pitt, who walked a concerned Nelly out while Riza and the rest merely stared after their departing backsides.

"Well, _that_ was a total dud," Rebecca sighed, blowing a strand of coiled hair out of her eyes in conflict.

"Rebecca, was Winry really drunk out there?" Riza asked, sternly. "She was not suppose to get drunk – we agreed on it. We were suppose to bring her back sober!"

"Well, she _was _getting a bit too happy when I last saw her," Rebecca hesitantly confessed. "But I told the guy not to let her drink anymore!"

"Ugh, no way!" Sciezska pinched the bridge of her nose. "Rebecca! These guys could care less about her state of mind! They'd let her pass out in the middle of a dance if it meant taking out a few extra bucks!"

"Well, how was _I_ suppose to know?" Rebecca grumbled, sounding distinctly apologetic, however. "I don't usually chaperone you guys! You should've kept a sharper eye on her!"

"Lets just go to my place," Riza sighed, finishing her drink. She called a waitress over and paid the woman for the drinks she had been keeping record of. "The nights ruined without those two, anyway."

"Yeah," Sciezska mimicked her, giving the heady club one last look over before following the two girls out the front door; leaving behind the night scene and the furious stripper who got to their table a tad too late behind; the two buff security men hurrying outside only to miss them by a hairs breadth – the group of friends long gone into the night.

* * *

Winry groaned against the sunlight. She turned her head, clutching her skull when she fluttered her eyes open and felt pain rise in her stomach. She was in her usual sleeping clothes, a pair of pink shorts and a black tank top, and her hair was loose and tangled. Her mouth held a tacky, weird, feel – like cotton – and her head pounded as if she had a bad headache.

She briefly wondered who had changed her out of her previous clothing and the answer came when a hand pressed against her forehead, a sigh coming from above her.

"You finally awake? It's already two in the afternoon."

"Two?" she cleared her raspy throat, sitting up and rubbing her crusty eyes out. "Why didn't you wake me up earlier?"

"You looked like you could use the rest," Ed replied dryly, helping her out of the bed. She looked like crap, he idly noticed, but somehow she still managed to seem as if she were only under the effects of the flu and not a major hangover...

"What happened yesterday? Wait, where's Nelly and Riza—!"

"Nelly and Pitt left a while ago," he cut brusquely. "And I haven't heard a word from Riza or your other shit friends."

Winry frowned at his tone. "Riza and the rest are my _friends _and if you don't like them then tough because they're going to be my friends until I decide otherwise!"

"Real friends wouldn't leave you, _drunk,_ in the middle of a godforsaken _strip club_," he spat nastily, "vulnerable to all those disease-carrying dickheads!"

"Ed, nothing happened—!"

"Because I didn't let anything happen!" Ed thundered. "If I hadn't been there then who know's what would have happened to you!"

"But I was by myself, nothing could have happened," she pointed out meekly, rather intimidated by his furious tone.

"That guy sure looked like he wanted _something_ out of you," Ed darkly muttered, fist clenching. "He's lucky I had better things to do, like take you home, or else it would've gotten ugly..."

Winry rubbed her temple, noticing for the first time since she woke up that Ed looked haggard and tired. There were circles under his eyes, no doubt from sleep deprivation, and the tone he used was still tense and anxious; the stress lines on his forehead having yet to smooth.

_He was so worried, _she thought, guiltily. She stood up slowly, giving her left eye one final rub, before grabbing his hand and pulling him closer to her. Winry smiled softly once fell into him, cheek pressing against the hot skin of his shoulder while his arms wrapped tightly around her shoulders.

He seemed to relax a bit, she noticed, and she briefly wondered why he was so wound up in the first place? She knew his concern for her sometimes spiraled out of control (it most likely exploded yesterday due to her outrageous tour of the single life) but she was positive that once the danger passed, he became his normal self but...

"What's wrong?" Winry asked, her finger drawing lines on his stomach. "Ed?"

"You know?" Ed sighed, tiresomely. "You really _are _a pain in the ass."

She frowned, not sure how to take that rather honest comment.

He patted her head adoringly, adding: "I guess you're my pain in the ass."

"You're a pain, too, you know," Winry mumbled, smiling when he continued to stroke her head.

"... You _are_ aware that this is the last time I let you out of my sight, right?" he gave her head one last stroke before he let his hand smooth down her hair, resting on her shoulder blade while she sighed and only snuggled closer to his chest; not really minding.

"Jeez, Rebecca is right – you _are _worse than her dad!" Winry laughed softly. "I can only imagine how you'll be once you really _are_ a dad!"

Ed paused, contemplating her words. "Are you trying to say something?"

"Maybe," she giggled and pulled away from him, laughing when he smirked and dashed after her; picking her up in one strong haul and dumping her on the bed – rolling his eyes when she whined that her head hurt and only stating that it was her fault for allowing not being able to hold her liquor.

"You got drunk once before, too, remember? Your eighteenth birthday?"

"Yeah, but I never went to a strip club when I got shitfaced, did I?"

"I wouldn't have let you go in the first place," she huffed.

"How do you think _I_ feel then?" he snapped, casting fuming eyes in her direction. She lowered her own, suddenly feeling very guilty for ever entering that sinful club in the first place. She supposed she wouldn't have liked it if Ed had waltzed right into a female strip club and had a bunch of strange women coping feels...

"I'm sorry..." she apologized, rather miserably.

His glare softened and he ended up scratching his cheek in response to her apologetic stare. She just had to look like a kicked puppy, didn't she? "It's fine, I guess. You didn't know until you got there, so..."

"But I still shouldn't have gone inside," she insisted, no longer looking at him. "I knew what I was getting into...I'm really sorry...you must be so tired..."

"Hey, don't start crying, okay?" Ed warned, warily eying her downcast gaze. "I don't blame you for going into the club in the first place. Who I _do_ blame are those three bitches—!"

"Ed, please, don't curse my friends out in front of me," Winry groaned, rolling on her side as he continued to mutter obscenities under his breath.

The phone rang and Winry crawled over to the bedside, gently kicking Ed away when he tried to grab the phone before her. She quickly answered, sticking her tongue out at Edward, who glared at being beat to it.

"Riza?" she greeted, surprised. "Hi, how are you?"

"Oh, hell no," Ed growled, trying to grab the phone from her hand but she dodged each attempt quickly.

"Yeah, I'm fine—Ed, quit it! It's just Riza!"

"That's _why_," he replied, frustratingly. "Gimmie the damn phone!"

"She says she sorry," Winry told him, keeping him away from her with her foot in his stomach. "And that it wasn't her intention to get me drunk rather to just take me out for some fun before I marry you..."

"To a _strip club_?" Ed screeched, indignant. "She could have taken you to a restaurant or a casino or something _other_ than a goddamn strip club, you know!"

"She said I needed to expand my knowledge..." Winry innocently answered.

"Okay, then, _Winry_," Ed began, sarcastically. "Tell me: just what did you learn from going to a strip club?"

"Well...I learned that girls aren't the only ones who can wear thongs and you don't look half bad in a tux!" she laughed at his gawking face, Riza's own laughter mingling with Rebecca and Sciezska's, both of whom had been listening to the conversation with rapt attention and were more than amused to hear Edward's embarrassed shrieking on the other side before the line went dead.


End file.
